American companies spend Billions on TV advertising alone each year because whether we realize it or not, what we put into our heads over and over again can't help but influence us. And when the only narratives about relationships and love you see are as problematic as you've pointed out, of course lots of people bought into it - both women and men - who undoubtedly thought that was how they were supposed to act.

This was SUCH a good essay. I'm saving it for future reference.