And I've repeatedly told him not only how feminism has tons in it for men as far as gender equal countries having longer life and better health for men - as well as greater happiness, he also thanked me the other day for introducing him to the fact that MLK was decidedly NOT nice in the way that he is advocating. He was unflinching about what was wrong with the culture, but also with the white people who were turning a blind eye to that. It got him killed, but it also got most everything he advocated for encoded into the Civil Rights Act.

He is extremely condescending and we've talked about that too - and why allies need to follow the lead of the marginalized group, not swoop in and tell them how to "fix" things. He sort of hears it but then reverts to being run almost completely by subconscious drivers that bypass cognition and the ability to make conscious choices and we're back to square one.