As we've talked about numerous time, confidence is key, and by your own admission, you did not have that. I'm glad your coach helped you work on it but taking actions that demonstrate confidence isn't acting like a leader in a hierarchy, it's acting like a guy who knows what he brings to the table, which is always going to be attractive. Those are two very different things that are sometimes being conflated in the languaging, I think.

If you look at the comments from women on this story, you'll notice they all agree with me. No woman wants to be dominated (unless that's part of a kink relationship), but they do want someone who is strong, knows who they are, isn't living in their mom's basement, isn't wishy-washy, etc., etc. and there are an awful lot of men like that out there, who are just gutless, aimless, and kind of pathetic. Also, read the story on men who act like one of their wife's kids, and how common that is. I think what you're hearing is a reaction to that - again with languaging that doesn't really reflect the truth for most women. There's an entire trad-wife movement right now but that doesn't mean that most women actually want that. Most women want strong partners - strong yes, but also partners.

I see a lot of stories written by women mocking men who are going to foreign countries looking for more "traditional" women they think they can dominate - because to most women that signals insecurity and narcissism. I see zero stories written by women looking for someone to treat them like a side-kick and not an equal (which is what "leadership" and "traditional" implies).

Dominant does not equal dominating. Confident does not equal controlling. Almost no women today want "traditional" patriarchal relationships and acting like they do is just a reaction from men to increasing social expectations of equality.

All that being said, I'm really glad to hear that the wheels are turning in the right direction for you and that each new step brings you greater evidence that you can keep moving forward.