But being kind to others is not feeding a toxic culture. Yes, women are culturally exhorted to give up everything that is themselves in order to serve the needs of others, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t still give of yourself to those around you without feeding that narrative, because despite that toxic narrative, giving of yourself to others is not inherently degrading and can be done in balance to your own needs. I certainly support teaching our children better and carving out a niche for yourself, but I also believe that the most profoundly healing opportunity we have in this fucked up culture is to truly connect with others on the deeply human level that we were meant to.