Did she then offer to make you the beneficiary of her will since her son's don't need the money? Yeah, I didn't think so. You definitely had a right to bring this up and discuss it. She should have accepted your apology for not doing so in the way that you wish you had and your dad should be forthright with you about what he's decided, even if it's not what you prefer. It's not right to spring that stuff on family who is already grieving and upset. It just makes a potentially tense situation worse.