Do as I say or suffer the consequences is exactly what narcissists and domestic abusers do. Making ultimatums around what someone else can and cannot wear, who they can and cannot talk to or associate with, giving them scripts that they are commanded to use in certain situations - you honestly see that as healthy behavior? His insecurity is not her problem to manage. It's his problem to work through. And if he'd had a competent and ethical therapist, he would have realized that. He needed to talk to Brady about his feelings, be vulnerable, and elicit her help in coming up with ways to help him manage those feelings that go beyond making her solely responsible for them. Honestly, this is basic and fundamental healthy relationship dynamics 101. The fact that you don't seem to grasp that is amazing to me.

If you don't trust your partner, giving them a bunch of rules and mandates isn't going to magically improve the situation. Fences don't make good relationships, trust and intimacy do, and you don't get that by making a whole bunch of controlling demands that limit someone else's autonomy and independence. Boundaries are rules that you impose on yourself, they are not rules you unilaterally impose on somebody else -because of your feelings of insecurity.

And, this is the last I'm going to say about this to you. Making your partner responsible for managing your emotions is not healthy, and it's not reasonable.