Francesca, thanks for your comment. This is a part of what I am objecting to. Anything that perpetuates the myth of “No, no, no…..oh, wait I really liked it” is harmful and portraying what is essentially rape culture.

My understanding of true BDSM is that the sub is actually the one with the most power because that person sets the parameters and is playing out things that she/he is getting off on. The Dom is in large part garnering enjoyment from giving the sub what they want. I find submission to be very relaxing and being the top to be a lot of work.

Also, BDSM is more about consensual power exchange, and less about sadomasochistic sensation. To me, a lot of what is being portrayed is a veneer to justify abuse.