Honestly, you really have an obsession with victim-blaming. That’s the first thing you think of when I mentioned that someone was raped was how it must have been her fault somehow? And how can you with a straight face say that women shouldn’t do dumb shit that puts them in danger when at the same time you think it’s a cop-out to not always stand up for yourself or to talk about the dangers that may potentially arise when doing that - particularly since you have no idea whether this time it will be safe and empowering or whether this time it will be deadly. The same might be said of a woman walking home alone at night - sometimes it's empowering and sometimes it's dangerous. You aren’t talking from a reasoned intellectual position - you’re speaking from some sort of emotional construct most likely related to one of the defense mechanisms that I mentioned earlier.

Of course people should take responsibility for themselves, but bad behavior is the fault of those who perpetrate it, not those who happened to be hurt by it. I don't have to start wearing a burka so that men won't have impure thoughts, FFS! Just how regressively do you really want to get here?

I should be able to walk around naked and not be harassed or assaulted for that. It’s only dumb to do that in the context of a fucked up society. As you have noted, in an environment where that is not automatically considered an invitation to sexual violence, it’s fine and no big deal - and I’ve done that quite comfortably and safely. So, the problem is clearly not the woman and her behavior, it’s the fucked up culture that teaches and allows predation. In an environment where that is not tolerated, it doesn’t take place. I’ve spent a lot of time in swinger’s clubs wearing not a whole lot and never had an issue with safety or being respected. At the clothing optional resort, I never had a second's thought for whether or not someone would grope me or catcall me. You aren't wanting women to be more self-responsible; you are wanting them to be responsible for the actions of men it sounds like. Where is male self-responsibility in this equation?

We’re all heavily indoctrinated into the patriarchy - men and women (and others), which is why I write about the social system as a problem and not about men as a problem. As you know, I’ve also written about how women uphold that system as well, and about some of the issues that causes, but since women objectively still do not hold the vast majority of social, economic or political power (despite some progress), it makes greater sense to me when talking about the power structure to talk primarily about those who are still at the helm of it (and fighting hard to stay there - the attack on the capitol being one very clear example of that).

I have no interest in pointing fingers - at either men or women, except on the occasion that individuals have done something to me personally, which I will probably still then equate with how that relates to their cultural indoctrination because that is typically a relevent element. Cognitive science says that only typically only about 2% of thought is actually conscious. We're all run by our programming and whatever else we've been taught to believe along the way, unless we've done the work to make ourselves a bit more conscious.

What is happening under the surface is the name of the game, so you can continue to run around telling women about how stupid and weak they are, but again what does that really accomplish other than making you feel good that you are better than them? Has any one woman ever thanked you for showing her the error of her ways? The other women who highlight your stories are no better than the friends who told the raped woman about how that would never happen to them. It's a defense mechanism and a way to feel good about themselves by looking down on someone else - a patriarchal construct that women are just as capable of us men.

For the most part, people are not individuals - they are sheep, and while I'd really like to enourage them to do the work of individuation, that's not likely to take place. So, second best, I'd at least like them to buy into group behaviors that are not based in violent domination of each other as a way to gain and maintain social status. I'd like to have more places where the ethos of nude beaches and swinger's clubs prevails. That's the world I'm working to bring about.