How about “This shit is killing you and making you miserable. Do something different.” But the problem is men are so deeply identified with this sort of masculinity they think it’s who they are- something that is demonstrably untrue since it is different in some other cultures and time periods. And, patriarchy produces insecurity and the belief that you must defend yourself while discouraging self reflection. A lot of men don’t want to change. They would ignore 40 years of research and try to recapture the “glory days” of the past. But the 1950s are gone and we are never going back. Better to adapt. That’s who evolution favors - not the strong ones but the most flexible.