I don't care who else has done that. It's abusive behavior and there is no excuse for it. We live in a fucked up, possessive, and patriarchal culture. It is not "your life" when you are engaging in what most relevant professionals deem to be a kind of domestic abuse. Telling someone else who they can talk to and what they can wear is prima facie trying to damage them. It’s treating them like an object that you own rather than a partner that you are in relationship with.

From now on, you do what I say. You wear what I approve and you speak to whom I say you can. If your job threatens me, you quit. I am now the boss of you and your interests, beliefs, and autonomy no longer count for shit. If I am weak and insecure, it is your job to turn yourself into a pretzel so that I can feel better. You aren't actually a person - you are a puppet that I control.

Does that feel OK to you? Do you honestly think that anyone should subject themselves to that? If so, please get some therapy, because you have serious issues.