I don't know that they actually do - when there is constant jousting for position and power, there is a lot of inherent dysfunction (as anyone who has ever worked in an office can attest). It's a Might Makes Right system, and although that did allow humans to build the pyramids, it was accomplished on the backs of slaves. The "efficiency" of top down leadership comes with a lot of downsides.

The earliest cities were still largely run by neighborhood councils and not the king or mayor or other centralized government A) because humans value autonomy and B) because efficient and effective centralized government is very hard to accomplish.

https://medium.com/inside-of-elle-beau/personal-autonomy-is-important-to-humans-cd2ea2ae495

I appreciate hearing that this resonates for you and how tiring and annoying it is. Although men do have some advantages in a patriarchy (even now) that is just one of the many ways that it's also harmful to men.