I haven't called you anything at all. I haven't called any man those things. I've simply noted that mainstream norms of masculinity drive all of those problematic social ills. And I've said that you have a duty to challenge those or you are a part of the problem.

When I've said things like "you're killing us, you're raping us" I am referring to not just the people who are actually doing that, but the guys who uphold and maintain those norms that drive the actual perpetrators - or the guys that turn a blind eye to them, because that's what allows the system to go on as it does. You don't have to be an actual rapist to be allowing rape to go on unfettered. Being a bystander who does nothing is nearly as bad.

Men’s violence against women is a pervasive social phenomenon with deep roots in existing personal, social, and institutional arrangements. In order for people to understand and ultimately work together to prevent it, it is first necessary for them to engage in a great deal of personal and collective introspection. This introspection can be especially threatening to men, because as perpetrators and bystanders, they are responsible for the bulk of the problem.

Katz, Jackson. The Macho Paradox (p. 24). Sourcebooks. Kindle Edition.