I never once advocated for that - in fact, I said the exact opposite. I simply noted that most autistics can't remotely even begin to mask. There is no way in the world for the vast majority of them to even begin to pretend to not appear autistic.

And, modern ABA does not try to force autistics to seem NT. It does not encourage making eye contact if that is difficult or unpleasant, for example. It is not remotely the same thing as conversion therapy and it's a really inappropriate parallel coming from someone with no firsthand or substantive understanding of what ABA actually is and does.

As already noted, making accommodations isn't going to cut it for a huge percentage of autistics. My son can't tie his shoes or brush his own teeth adequately. He can't be left alone and sometimes needs help in the bathroom. Just exactly what kind of meaningful work are you imagining for him?

I agreed with you over and over again that all people should get to be who they actually are, but discounting out of hand the things that I've shared with you about my son's difficulties in life, and my own is both hurtful and disappointing. Autistic people with careers and relationships who have no understanding of just how rare that is could use a little bit more compassion for the rest of the autism world. Acceptance and accommodation are simply not enough and pretending they are is ignoring the realities of our struggles.