I understand that you have faced and continue to face many challenges, but this absolutely is a well-documented and time tested method for having a better life. I almost never hear you say something that isn't almost reflexively negative. Try working on that, and with the stories behind that (even though they come with a lot of "evidence"). Here's a great article to get you started:

https://www.doctornerdlove.com/this-is-how-you-break-your-self-limiting-beliefs/

"We’ve talked about inner game and self-limiting beliefs before, but one thing we haven’t talked about is what self-limiting beliefs are: they’re stories. They’re stories that you tell yourself about yourself."