I was in high school in the 1980s and there was maybe one fight a year at my school. Again, I'm not trying to negate your personal experiences. I'm just pointing out that they are not universal, which no doubt accounts for the discrepancy in perceptions. Glad to hear that your son has not had your experiences.

I do recognize that part of the "Man Box" involves acting tough and even aggression, but like I said, I've never personally known a man who had any significant experience with the type of violence you describe. I'm guessing that is true as well for the women whose essays frustrate you. I don't think they are discounting violence against men; they just have little awareness of how pervasive it truly is, and conversely they are swimming in personal awareness of violence against women.

Part of this is due to "Man Box" rules around toughness and stoicism, as well as accompanying cultural narratives that this an acceptable and normal part of masculinity. It's par for the course of a dominance based hierarchy, but that certainly doesn't mean that it's acceptable to me and I can now understand why this is a topic that feels very personal to you.

I'm glad we finally got to a place of greater understanding and dialogue. Peace?