If mother's are indoctrinating their sons into harmful norms of masculinity then sure, they are partially responsible for that, but it's well documented that parents are only a small part of the equation as relates to gender indoctrination because it's all around us in every aspect of the culture, from peers, to media and everything in between. In addition, men perform masculinity primarily for each other's approval. That's part of why it's called the Man Box.
You're missing the point here - it's not that men are bad, it's that traditional (aka patriarchal) norms of masculinity as they appear today in this part of the world drive violence, drive rape culture, AND drive negative mental and physical health outcomes for men. That has nothing to do with intrinsic masculinity. You can be as defensive as you want to, but it doesn't change anything except our collective ability as a society to move toward something that is healthier and works better for everyone.
And although much of this societal messaging is that males are more competent, independent, and worthy of holding power, strict gender norms hurt boys and men as well. The Global Early Adolescent Study, based at Johns Hopkins University, concludes that due to these gender norms, “they engage in and are the victims of physical violence to a much greater extent than girls; they die more frequently from unintentional injuries, are more prone to substance abuse and suicide; and as adults their life expectancy is shorter than that of women. Such differences are socially not biologically determined.”
While gender norms may offer young men status and power, they can also cause them harm. Masculine gender norms can make it more likely for young men to struggle with their mental health, leading to substance misuse, risky behaviours, violence, aggression, and judicial problems. Men are also more likely to attempt or die by suicide.
