I'm glad you've had some success saying this stuff to men, because I feel like I've had very little - but maybe the difference is it's coming from a woman, or maybe it's just a different pool of people who received it, who knows.

For the record, I'm an American also. It's just that I read something recently about Europe and how the economic factor is really driving anti-feminism there. I do think that most younger Americans have grown up in a world where there is a lot more overt equality and so guys don't necessarily see just how lacking that still is in very deep and insidious ways. But it's also hard to argue that the rise of Andrew Tate, and even guys like Jordan Peterson aren't part of a backlash against female empowerment. Some of it is just more fundamental insecurity to be sure, but a part of that is (I think) "You're supposed to be here for my pleasure and enjoyment, and you're telling me that you want me to actually be there for you too, in ways that I don't have good skills around... "

In any case, remaking masculine socialization is key to things going better for us all, I think.