In order for that to happen, both partners have to buy into it to some extent. My amendment to what you’ve said is to establish an actual partnership before you get married, most likely by living together first. Really talk about your expectations and needs and actively craft a relationship that works for you, because otherwise, you will most likely fall into the scenario you described as a default. I didn’t do this when I got married, but I did do it more recently and I’m a lot happier with things on that front now.

Dear Elle, What Does It Mean To Co-Create A Relationship?