I've been happily married for over 30 years so I have a boots-on-the-ground idea of what it takes to make that happen. That being said, women file for 69% of divorces, typically citing their husband's reluctance to show up like an actual partner - either emotionally or in the running of their lives - as the main reason. Researchers have noted that marriage has failed to keep up with more egalitarian norms, and that too many men view marriage through an entitled lens.
https://www.asanet.org/women-more-likely-men-initiate-divorces-not-non-marital-breakups/
Women are more likely than men to initiate divorces, but women and men are just as likely to end non-marital relationships, according to a new study that will be presented at the 110th Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Association (ASA).
Perhaps women were more likely to initiate divorces because, as Rosenfeld found, married women reported lower levels of relationship quality than married men. In contrast, women and men in non-marital relationships reported equal levels of relationship quality.
Rosenfeld said his results support the feminist assertion that some women experience heterosexual marriage as oppressive or uncomfortable.
“I think that marriage as an institution has been a little bit slow to catch up with expectations for gender equality,” Rosenfeld said. “Wives still take their husbands’ surnames, and are sometimes pressured to do so. Husbands still expect their wives to do the bulk of the housework and the bulk of the childcare. On the other hand, I think that non-marital relationships lack the historical baggage and expectations of marriage, which makes the non-marital relationships more flexible and therefore more adaptable to modern expectations, including women’s expectations for more gender equality.”
If you have a pervasive experience of women pushing you away, you may wish to consider what part you play in that dynamic. You seem to look at relationships and marriage in particular not through the lens of spending your life with someone you adore, but as some sort of societal milestone that you are entitled to — which explains in a nutshell why so many women are running in the other direction to escape this sort of thinking from too many men today. She’s not an accessory to complete you and give you social cache — she’s a human being with thoughts and needs and desires of her own. Start thinking of women as people rather than as accessories to meet your needs and you’ll probably do a lot better with them.
