Mostly men are raped by other men. There are some exceptions, but it's not the biggest part of the problem, and the reasons men are raped are similar to the reasons women are - to exert power and dominance, to put someone perceived as weaker "in their place" and to feel in control by taking that away from someone else. So, you're right that using that as a deflection is not cool, it's also part of the same larger dynamic.

The larger point of this piece is absolutely correct though. If men are tired of hearing about this stuff, they need to do something about it by realizing it's a systemic societal issue that is maintained by mainstream masculine norms such as bonding via objectifying and denigrating women, turning a blind eye to men who behave badly, performatively disbelieving women who speak up, etc. We have the culture that we tolerate. In some societies, rape is essentially unknown because it's considered unmanly and isn't tolerated. In ours, it's not considered "good" per se, but it is unfortunately, rather normal.

“[Ours] is a culture in which sexualized violence, sexual violence, and violence-by-sex are so common that they should be considered normal. Not normal in the sense of healthy or preferred, but an expression of the sexual norms of the culture, not violations of those norms. Rape is illegal, but the sexual ethic that underlies rape is woven into the fabric of the culture.” — Robert Jensen