My husband and I haven't used condoms with each other for many years, but he always uses them when we have sex with other people and he swears that they are no big deal. He says the change in sensation is really minimal. The guys that we play with don't engage in these games either. I really think this is an entitlement thing you are describing more than anything, and that it's mostly in their heads because they don't think they should have to wear one.