NO NO NO NO!!! Even poor men, even homeless men have privilege in certain circumstances over any women. Not wanting to be homeless doesn't mean that having financial security has negated your marginalization. And yes, poverty is extremely marginalizing but deciding that it's MORE marginalizing than being Arabic (for example) in a white Christian environment is both unnecessary and not that cut and dried. It's a deflection and it’s zero-sum dominance hierarchy thinking to try to rank something like that.
What about this don't you understand? Rich women are constantly marginalized, and constantly victimized - usually from the time they are 10 years old, if not earlier. Being well-off doesn't protect them from that. They are still raped by their dates, abused by their husbands, marginalized by their bosses, harassed by strangers, underestimated by society just the same as all other women. Sure, they are in many ways better off than poor women of color who face all those same things, as well as their socioeconomic and racial oppression, but they are not "acting like victims" - my god, I hate that phrase - for noting all of the millions of ways that they already have to work twice as hard as men just to be taken seriously, to be safe, to navigate all the double-edged swords of what it means to be a woman in this culture.
And you telling a historically marginalized and deeply discriminated against population of people that their experiences aren't that bad, that their pain isn't real, that they are whining and acting like victims - that is what isn't right! That's a real asshole white man thing to do, and I honestly expected better from you on that. You clearly have ZERO understanding of what it's actually like to be a woman, and yet you are going to judge it through the lens of your own expectations and beliefs. So not cool!!
Feeling a bit uncomfortable as a not-so-traditional (but still heterosexual) man is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like being part of a truly marginalized and structurally discriminated against population. You obviously don't know the first thing about what women actually face and what women are doing trying to challenge that - something that makes it really offensive for you to look down your nose and judge. Lots of women are getting their faces bloodied challenging this shit every day of their lives. I'm an economically secure white woman and I'm getting bloody on a regular basis - to the point where it's so taxing on my health that I sometimes have to step back from it for my own sanity. Acting like most women are doing nothing at all to create a better culture and instead are just sitting around whining is truly out of touch with reality. Acting like the dynamics of the femdom scene are in any way transferable to the outside world is too. In the real world, there is a substantial, and often violent backlash against women who try to claim or exercise "masculine coded" power; there are all sorts of prices to pay on a variety of levels for doing that - and yet lots of women do it anyway, knowing that they are likely to get more of the same the next time they demand to be seen and heard, and still they are doing it anyway. That's how we've gotten this far in the past 50 years - from exactly that dynamic with very little help from most men. The more power women have, the more backlash that they face.
Women get beaten up and killed for telling men no, they don't want to give them their phone number. Women in the highest levels of government are habitually sexually harassed and have to fight to be taken seriously - not because they are weak, but because the culture that we live in is still fighting tooth and nail to put them back in their place. Focusing on how women need to do better without mostly ever touching on how a patriarchal society and a problematic culture of masculinity need to change is tone-deaf and designed to foist all responsibility onto those who are harmed by this culture rather than those who are doing most of the harming. It's pretty ugly. The problem isn't "acting like a victim" when you very clearly and demonstrably have been victimized - it's being a perpetrator. How about we spend a little bit more time focused on that part, because that's where the actual problem lies.
https://www.salon.com/2023/10/23/women-pushed-out-of-academic-work-by-sexism-harassment-study/
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/hundreds-of-women-in-national-security-sign-anti-assault-letter/
https://time.com/6163490/authority-gap-between-men-and-women-hurts-us-all/
