No, this is 100% the source of all these problems - for men, for women, for everybody. How on earth can you deny that when it's patently obviously a part of mainstream culture? Masculinity is about domination in our culture, in particular about having control over women, but also about bullying boys and men into a very, very narrow acceptable definition of what is allowed in order to be considered masculine. This isn't just me and Mark Greene saying this - it's been studied (mostly by men) for over 40 years. They all say the same thing.
Paul Kivel conceptualized the “Act Like a Man Box” in the early 1980’s, by asking high school boys what the rules were for being a man. It turned out the rules were pretty straightforward. They included:
• Hide all emotions
• Treat women as less, have control over women
• Be tough, never admit self doubt, fear
• Police and bully other boys who don’t conform.
More recently, when researchers asked a socially and ethnically diverse range of men ages 18–30 in the US, the UK, and Mexico what it takes to be a “real man” the responses were very similar. Here are the 7 main pillars: (see the linked story for more about this, but if this isn't taking place then why are suicide attempts for non-gender conforming boys so astronomically higher than the average?)
https://medium.com/inside-of-elle-beau/men-describe-what-it-takes-to-be-a-real-man-c694595b4366
The fact that you, as a non-NT person did not experience more bullying that that astounds me. Glad for you, but it's hardly typical. Nobody ever called you a pussy? Nobody ever told you to stop acting like a sissy? Or that you throw like a girl? Nobody ever told you to "man up" or that boys don't cry? If so, I'm happy for you, but that is not the reality of how our culture works for nearly everyone else. The part about forcing men to suppress their emotions is incredibly well documented, and again, so are the destructive outcomes that stem from that. The APA just recently issued new guidelines to help therapists help males navigate this aspect of our culture. The fact that you don't see it doesn't mean it isn't taking place.
I'm not buying your Jordon Peterson schtick about "healthy" competition either. CEOs have a much higher level of sociopathic tendencies than the general population because in a dominance hierarchy, that reads as leadership. And it's not healthy, and it's not OK. This is my academic area of expertise -the social science of the dominance hierarchy in America, but also in our ancient past when it first arose, so I've got a lot of informed opinions about this. There is such a thing as healthy competition but we rarely see it within the dominance hierarchy context - because a part of that dynamic is maintaining traditional power via any means necessary - including barring others from ever getting a chance to compete - essentially what we saw in the US until 50 years ago when the laws finally changed to allow Blacks and women to even have the opportunity to compete with White men. This mindset continues today, even though the laws have changed, and that is what is the source of literally all of our social ills, from racism, to homophobia, to sexism, to schoolyard bullying.
