Oh good fucking lord! How exactly are we supposed to solve problems if we aren't allowed to name them? Men are suffering from depression but it hurts their egos to point that out???? REally? But it's OK for them to blame women for that... You are making my case for me - men need to help other men come to terms with this shit before they all do go extinct from colossal stupidity.
All men, with very few exceptions, are in the Man Box to some extent. Even men who do "men's work" and "equality work" full time for decades still find they have blind spots and places where their socialization clouds their good intentions. Gender indoctrination begins at birth and comes from any and all directions throughout a man's life. Most forms of discrimination come in the form of unconscious biases. If we can't dig into that unconscious messaging and challenge it, then nothing ever changes. I'm not willing to accept that - for my son or for myself.
If most men aren't strong enough, aren't manly enough to face that they are not perfect and that their culture has taught them some shitty things, then they deserve to continue to be depressed and suicidal and to die from alcohol poisoning or being killed by some other man who is more attached to his fragile ego than he is his own self preservation. Talk about the antithesis of evolutionary fitness...
All I said was that men need to help other men adjust to a changing world and you've acted like that was completely vicious and inappropriate. I said it in as kind and measured a way as I know how to while still being very honest and frank. Perhaps I should have instead adopted MLKs fire and merciless indictment of the ways that whites were failing - because sure, it got him killed, but it also got the Civil Rights Act passed.
"Men, it must frankly be said, are not putting in a similar mass effort to reeducate themselves out of their sexist ignorance. It is an aspect of their sense of superiority that the men of America believe they have so little to learn. The reality of substantial investment to assist women into the twenty-first century, adjusting to female colleagues and bosses and genuine safety and acceptance as equals, is still a nightmare for all too many female Americans…
These are the deepest causes for contemporary abrasions between the sexes. Loose and easy language about equality, resonant resolutions about equality fall pleasantly on the ear, but for women there is a credibility gap they cannot overlook. She remembers that with each modest advance the male population promptly raises the argument that women have come far enough. Each step forward accents an ever-present tendency to backlash."
To paraphrase Dr. King once more, “Why is equality so assiduously avoided? Why does male America delude itself, and how does it rationalize the evil it retains?"
But I didn't say that. Instead, I said that male researchers have determined from talking to men over 40 years time that some of the norms of "traditional" masculinity are hurting men - and everyone else. I said that men need to talk to other men about that because it's harder to hear coming from women, and yet, I'm a horrible harpy because according to you, most men are too weak to hear that they aren't perfect and that the way they've fucked up this culture by adhering to these stupid artificial norms isn't actually their fault (it's really all women's fault, oh, and Black and gay folks as well). SMH
We're all doomed...
