Such a great essay, filled with important questions and insights. I can remember being a young teen in the late 70s and having boys thrust a poster of the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders into my face saying, "Don't you wish you looked like that!?" I told them that in all honesty I did not, because I didn't want to be looked at as a piece of meat. And, at the same time, if that's the only kind of female sexuality I was ever exposed to growing up (and it was) then that can't help but impact my sense of my own sexuality. I've worked with that quite a bit, but how much more is deep in there.

I used to love watching Magnum, and thought nothing of that scene you posted because it was so ubiquitous in the culture. Of course, that's what he would do. That's what any red blooded American male would do, right? All media was from and for the male gaze, blatant sexualization of all attractive women was the norm. As far as we've come, it's still a huge issue in our culture.