Talking about the actual oppression that you are experiencing is not "having a victim mentality." And if you truly admired and respected women even half as much as you say you do, you would recognize that women are punished, very brutally sometimes, for trying to exercise power - and they still come back and try again and do it anyway. Refusing to acknowledge how true that is in favor of a "you whine too much" narrative - which is quite a patriarchal stance, btw - is uneducated about realities but also quite dismissive and condescending. You are way, way more bought into patriarchal values than you recognize.

You do not have standing to tell someone else whose experiences you have never had how to feel or how to respond to their discrimination, their bullying, or their oppression. It's asshole white man behavior. Don't be THAT guy!