The current culture of masculinity in this society is unattractive, noxious, entitled, violent, and also extremely dangerous for men. C'mon, you know me well enough to know that I'm not just casually bashing men. This is what men themselves say about the expectations that are foisted up them - not just women complaining about it. (See the linked story at the end for more on that).
It's not actual in dispute that women initiate 70% of divorces. It's not actually in dispute that men are socialized away from having the emotional skills that are seen in this culture as "feminine." Stating those things is not attacking men - it's calling out a toxic culture of masculinity that hurts everyone by stating things that are factually so.
A part of the way that culture manifests in the dating world is that many men no longer bother to shower or make any effort whatsoever when going on a date. I'm reading about this all the time lately. And, due to 40 years of hookup culture, many of them also think that every woman they go out with owes them sex - even if they showed up smelly. This is what women are regularly reporting. I'm sorry if that offends you, but speaking up about this is not the problem - the people who are doing this shit are the problem.
I know lots of great guys. I'm married to one. He's not perfect, but then neither am I. I have no issue with guys like him, but after thousands of years of women putting up with patriarchy, and all the shit that goes with that, I see no reason that they should stay silent any longer about things that are harmful.
If you haven't already read this story of mine, I suggest that you do. Man Box masculinity is harmful and it needs to go.
