The three claps were for the laugh about raising the age of consent. I've never said that I hate the dominance hierarchy or that women bear no responsibility for what happens in their lives. Please don't put words in my mouth. I'm simply pointing out the societal mechanisms that are in play rather than asserting how things ought to be in a world that doesn't currently exist - and is unlikely to ever exist. And if you know and understand brain development WTF are you publishing that 18 year olds ought to understand the implications of their behavior when you know full well that they don't?
Telling women that they ought to do better about standing up for themselves when that very well means in the real world that they will be cussed out, retaliated against professionally, physically attacked, or murdered is not exactly a viable solution. It's victim-blaming and upholding the worst parts of the dominance hierarchy with a Might Makes Right kind of attitude. "Don't want to be hurt, well, don't be so weak then...." No, that's not the world that I want to live in and it's not an acceptable response.
“Those that make others victims are the problem. Not the victims. Forget ‘victim mentality’, show me the assholes with ‘perpetrator mentality’ because they are the problem here."
Here's a useful illustration from the same article:
"After all, one of the main rules of this patriarchal social hierarchy is that those with more power are allowed to abuse those with less, and they must accept it with grace and stoicism. This is why Ted Yoho expected that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez would simply take his disparaging remarks towards her. When she told him he was being rude, he called her a “fucking bitch.”
White male power is so assumed as to be wholly indistinguishable from what we simply recognize as “power,” and with it, the whispered implication that those with authority have somehow earned that authority fairly and squarely, while those who challenge authority and its abuses are wily manipulators.
Meanwhile patriarchal power abuse remains so expected as to not be notable as a violation of norms or civility, as disruptive or chaotic. Instead, it simply coexists with the authority, the command, the humanity of white men — it’s just part of what their power looks like."
The Poison of Male Incivility: When a woman dares respond to it, she’s seen as “disruptive.”
The way to change the current power structure is to call it out for what it is - harmful to pretty much everyone because it is wielded against women, but also against anyone with less clout or who is societally viewed as weaker. If we as a culture essentially groom people to act this way, and to accept this sort of hierarchy, then we shouldn't be surprised when it plays out. Just as I don't think that men who act on their socialization are monsters, I don't believe women who act on theirs are weaklings. The power dynamics embedded in the social system are the problem and that's where I believe we ought to be putting our attention.
