This was my mother after my father passed away. She had another partner for 22 years, but she never wanted to live with him or marry him because she wanted someone to do things with minus having to do his laundry and otherwise "take care of him" in the way that undoubtedly would have been expected for their age demographic. Sure, they could have talked through that and made the effort and spent time being vigilant about challenging doing "gender" the way they'd been trained all their lives, but she didn't want to do that work. She just wanted to have a fun companion and enjoy her life, and that's what they did.