Toxic masculinity means mainstream masculine traits taken to problematic extremes that are harmful to both men and women. It's absolutely a form of wounding, but that doesn't mean it doesn't actually exist or that it doesn't cause problems that guys need to take greater responsibility for. The American Psychological Association just issued new guidelines for working with boys and men that indicates that traditional masculinity is extremely harmful to men - and to everyone else. Pretending that "traditional masculinity" isn't the root of most of our societal problems is delusional. That doesn't mean men are bad; it means that our culture is fucked up. Sure, men deserve compassion, but they also need to do a much better job of taking on the harmful aspects of the culture and helping to confront them.