Elle Beau ❇︎
3 min readAug 14, 2020

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Well, first of all, I quoted a bunch of research about how much likeability is a factor and then I quoted to you from candidates who were smearing women for their perceived lack of likeability, then I quoted to you the non-substantive things that the Right is currently trying to cook up to discredit Harris, none of which is based in policy and all of which is centered on likeability. I always, always support what I'm saying with direct data and information and never, ever say things like, "Well, that's what they said on the news." I'd think that you'd realize that by now.

Likeability isn't generally much of an issue for men. It is a huge issue for female candidates. This is the point. I won't reiterate what I've already said, both in the OP and in subsequent comments, but this is what I've been talking about. It's a subconscious excuse to put women back in their place in the hierarchy when they aspire to male coded positions of power.

Believe you me, the sexism I face on a pretty much daily basis is not an abstraction. It took me until my 50s to heal from a lot of it, and what it did to my sense of self and even though I don't experience racism, I know all the myriad ways that this negatively impacts lives on a daily basis as well. That the oppressors are mostly doing it subconsciously because of the social system that they've grown up in is infinitely better than they are doing it because they are evil assholes, don't you think. That's my perspective at least.

I've never once said anything about equal result. Why are you putting words in my mouth? To quote Justice Ginsberg, "I ask no favor for my sex. All I ask is that you take your feet off our necks." Same goes for issues of race, homophobia, ablism, etc. And until 50 years ago there were legal barriers to equality in all of those areas, and in some instances much more recently than that. Some of the laws have changed, but a lot of the attitudes have not, one of them being that it is OK to bully those with less power than you. This is not OK. And this is all that anyone who advocates for equality is talking about.

If we just made the best of reality, we'd all still be British subjects, with children who work 100 hour weeks in factories. White men would be the only ones considered true citizens and they'd be the only ones allowed to vote, etc., etc., etc. That's a cop out. Your daughter can learn to fight an individual bully on her own. A women who is fired for being pregnant has no such option because she is being persecuted by her societal norms. A black person who is stopped in their own upscale neighborhood and harassed by the police has no individual recourse because it's a societal problem.

Cognitive scientists say that 2% of thought is conscious. You imagining that it's different doesn't make it so. And your final paragraph once again supports my theory. You've already said that Trump has no real policies, that many of his own supporters think he's an asshole, and that some people will secretly vote for him again. Why is that? Because he represents a social dynamic that they know, understand, and feel most comfortable with - not because he has the best policies but because of what he represents on the gut level.

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Elle Beau ❇︎
Elle Beau ❇︎

Written by Elle Beau ❇︎

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, I'm a saint. I do not feel ashamed. I'm your hell, I'm your dream, I'm nothing in between.

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