Yep - it can work both ways if you buy into that transactional model. The good news is, that even though most people are at least somewhat bought into the patriarchal idea that a man needs to be a "good provider" and that men think this even more than women do, most of both agree that being a caring and compassionate partner is what is most important (according to a Pew study).
"Men are especially likely to place a greater emphasis on their role as financial providers (emphasis mine). While a nearly equal share of men and women say a man needs to be able to provide for his family to be a good husband or partner (72% and 71%, respectively), men are less likely than women to say the same about women. Just a quarter of men say this is very important for a woman to be a good wife or partner, compared with 39% of women.
However, the importance of being the financial provider ranks behind being caring and compassionate when it comes to being a good spouse or partner, in the public’s estimation. Overwhelming majorities say it is very important for men (86%) and women (90%) to have these qualities to be good spouses or partners.”
